I Quit
Maybe quitting is the one thing you haven’t considered. After all, how can quitting create more for you? I am discovering that putting ourself first allows unimaginable resources to come to the fore. And being willing to quit is just the first step...
OK, I confess. My newsletter was a little late this week… and I actually don't what to hide that. It's so important we don't feel tied by algorithms, but instead we prioritise well-being. But what a week! And it all began with this phenomenal ‘tool’ for want of a better word.
Because it’s not really a tool, and if you treat it as such it just doesn’t work. No, this is serious and it means a lot.
ARE YOU HAPPY WITH WHERE YOU ARE NOW?
I wasn’t. I realised that my work life balance was totally off-kilter. I was so desperate for people to know I existed that I started throwing everything at my business. Every time there was a doubt, or a fear or just a minor niggle I felt compelled to react- to change something, to tweak something.
Weeks of content would appear in my head all at once and I would race to write it all down, then look back on it days later and realise that I couldn't remember what I was thinking when I wrote the title... and I had sacrificed time with my family for this. Unbelievable. The constant striving and hyper-arousal was leaving me exhausted.
AND THEN I REALISED SOMETHING ABSOLUTELY KEY
I didn't have to do this. Yup, that's right, you don't either. We don't have to do anything we don't want to do. I said to myself:
It's really not worth it. If I can't work on my own terms, I'd rather quit. Nothing is worth this level of tension. I can choose something different.
And of course, I hear ya! All the reasons why this wouldn't work for you; that you have a huge mortgage, that you're in debt, that you have people relying on you, that you couldn't survive if you stopped.
People like you do this every day. They courageously and with accountability admit that they've invested a huge amount of time, money and effort to be where they are today. They admit that they don't know how to change it, or even whether it's advisable to do so, but they realise that nothing is more important than their peace of mind and living with integrity.
It reminds me of people in debt who decide to stop debting- it's a similar feeling except, instead, you stop spending time and energy that aren't yours to give.
So, have I stopped coaching and facilitating people to transform their lives? Well, a funny thing happened when I drew my line is the sand. Knowing that I would quit if things went beyond a certain point left me free to hire myself again. I felt free to choose my job, and when it was no longer something I was suffering (and had to be made to do) I thought:
How would I like my work to be? What would be nourishing and beneficial for me and the people I'm supporting?
And here is what I realised was important to me once I gave myself the space to choose:
Being me in all my communications
Only doing what was interesting for me (not what was good for marketing)
Being honest and open about my ADHD
Doing what I felt like doing when I felt like doing it
Truly caring for people not just thinking about what I could get
Charging the price that was right for me (I'll write next week about how you can do that)
Acknowledging my worth and settling for nothing less
Because you see what I did was to embrace failure. I gave myself permission to fail and so was free to choose.
And if you're reading this and thinking:
Well...that's all right for her, she's self-employed I work for a company
Well, what if uncovering this was all just valuable information? What if actually putting yourself first allows unimaginable resources to come to the fore? What if you start loving your job more because you've realised it's what you want? Or what if you really want to quit after all this?Maybe you don't have to do it all overnight? And being willing to quit is just the first step... Even from your own business...
To discover what really matters to us we have to let go.
If I can help with this, book a £99 100% CLARITY SESSION with me
When you know what you want, everything becomes easier.
- Jessica Summers, August 2023 -
FURTHER RESOURCES TO EXPLORE
Jessica Summers Hypnogenics
Hypnogenics™ combines the glorious energy you're being, with the energy we are being together. It has evolved from energetics, empathic coaching, and hypnotherapy. Read more about this transformative process HERE
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Jessica
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